Random thoughts and bits of life of a coffee loving artist

Wednesday, April 1, 2020

The 2020 Roller-coaster

     Life happens and it seems that 2020 is tossing folks into the biggest test of all. We're already 4 months in and so much has happened on this roller-coaster that it's hard to keep a firm grasp of what's happening. So let me start off with this - You are not alone. 

Riding up the hill

     Personally I have had a handful of high points already since the start of the year. Not only am I making some small improvements with my business which I can tell are making some minor positive impacts on my work but I have been able to participate in a couple of competition shows already. I am also currently working on a handful of projects which include both customer orders and a new competition piece which I hope to enter sometime in the middle of April. Of course I'm not about to let these achievements get to my head. Over the years I have learned that those moments are points where I can use to push myself forward in order to improve in various aspects of my life. 


Holding on for dear life 

     With every rise, there is a fall somewhere. The year so far has not been kind towards those I care about. A friend lost some family members since the start of the year. Financial woes have hit a couple of others hard, causing them to have to scrap through by the skin of their teeth. A divorce here and a separation there. On-the-job related injuries and asshole coworkers. At-home injuries and home improvement aftermaths.Then of course an illness that has the world in a panic. 

    Seeing everything happening to those around me has honestly put my normally positive attitude towards life and issues in general in jeopardy. So many friends have been coming to me for advice or at least an ear where they can vent their worries and anger. I do my best to cheer them up by pointing out the sliver of positive in their situations. Sometimes it works. Lately it's been touch-and-go. I've also seen friends who are normally so close, supportive and loving towards each other being set off in fits of anger or being offended over things that in under normal circumstances would be talked over like adults or moved past. Such outbursts are sadly happening in increased frequency and as of late I get put in a mediator position for a great many. I've observed that the quarantine, on top of nerves being raw from their personal stresses, has caused so many incidents of boiled over emotions. So many times have I've tried to get them to understand what was happening but I can't help but feel that they can't hear me through the thick fog of what is happening. So all I can do is hold onto them and help push them up the next hill saying 'Everything's going to be okay'. 

     

Still on the rails

     Even though I have been seeing what the last few months have been doing to those I hold dear, I feel as if there is a few things that I've learned from it that I wish to share. 
  1. Be patient. Everyone handles stress differently and some better then others. Some folks, especially introverts and those with various forms of autism or mental illness (i.e. bipolar, depression, etc.) can not handle large amounts of stress let alone for long periods of time. They may distance themselves as much as they can or may snap out at someone. I'm not saying either reaction is correct but please keep in mind that processing under such conditions are difficult so words may come out harsher then they would under normal circumstances. Extroverts tend to handle stress for prolonged periods of time a little better but even the best of folks will have their nerves become raw. Sometimes when this happens, outbursts of anger and frustration will occur. Again, it's not a reaction I condone but such things happen. Everyone, including yourself, are basically in a pressure cooker. At some point there is is going to be an explosion of raw emotion and though whoever is on the receiving end may not have been the main cause of it, they will feel the impact and in turn be part of a chain reaction. So please, be patient. Take a moment to pause and look at the situation first.
  2. For every low, there is a high. This one is difficult to really accept let alone remember. It's easy to see the negative and get into the mindset of 'everything's fucked, why bother'. It's harder to find the positive in dark situations. Even more so in forcing yourself to move forward. A small step is still progress.
  3. Be kind. Everyone is having a rough time right now which means kindness is needed even more then before. Be there for someone who just needs a hug or a positive word (digital communication, phone calls, or even a card totally qualifies in this). This also means to be kind to yourself. Take care of yourself physically and mentally. Tell yourself 'I can try again' and don't apologize to the world when you need to rest. 
  4. You are not alone. With the 'social distancing' and fear of the unknown along with uncertainty of the immediate future, everyone is on edge. Such a cocktail of stress and frustration makes for a dark cloud that blankets the senses. We become lost in the thought of 'what will become of me?' and end up focusing on the self. However, you are not alone. There's an entire world of people who are in this situation together and they're trying their hardest to lift each other up. So reach out towards those you care about. 
     I apologize for my little tangent but I thought that I would share things from another point of view. Even with the lows I've bared witness to, I have seen some positive things come out of them. These moments I'm holding on to and making sure they aren't lost. Call it what you will but I believe that my friends and loved ones will make it through these times.